Confessions of the Condo-Only 3 weeks? Really?

-As you can tell from the title of the post I have been reflecting on our time here lately. And the fact that it has only been 3 weeks. I told my husband I don't like this. "Don't like what?" he asked. "This whole condo thing. I don't like it." Yes, it's nicer than we could've ended up with. Yes, it has in an house washer and dryer, and there are lots of places within walking distance. But I still don't like it. I think I've been struggling with finding contentment-regardless of my circumstances. Someone please come and pop my selfish bubble I've been living in lately.

-I was challenged this morning by a statement I heard on a podcast I was listening to. I was listening to Chip Ingram and he was talking about God's best for us and said something along the lines of God sometimes takes us through or allows hard or difficult things to help us realize the bad things we have allowed in our lives-to help us turn away from them.

I've many times been convicted about the kind and amount of media I take in. Growing up TV was how we as a family relaxed in the evening, and I continue to rely on it as a means of taking a moment to unwind or relax. But there is not a lot on there that is good for "renewing my mind," or that helps me do as Phillipians 4:8 says,

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."

Nonetheless, I continue to struggle with watching too much and when I do watch it it's not usually something having nothing to do with what the above verse mentions. In fact it is usually the opposite. I spend way too much time on the Internet too, ebay, craigslist, email, facebook-sitting staring at the computer screen while my little one pulls and tugs wanting me to read one of his beloved tractor brochures. Or take him on a walk. Or just give him a moment of my attention.

And then, I have to wonder, is that partly what this whole condo thing is about? We get basically 3 or 4 channels here, and once is classic tv. Is this part of God trying to help me break this bad habit? Is the fact that Benjamin wants to go for a walk daily and generally not wanting to sit around the condo all day training me to take time out of my day just for him? Oh the challenge of fighting everything this world bombards us with, let alone protecting our kids from it. I think before we can protect our kids we have to learn to protect ourselves.

-On a different note, we were finally able to get our church pictures taken on Sunday. I wore a dress I had in my closet rather than one I had gone out and bought for the occasion, some shoes I got for free at a yard sale, and my $.25 jean jacket I got at Goodwill on quarter day. Kev wore a dress shirt and tie rather than a suit because he can't wear a suit coat with his crutches, and Benjamin wore the same tie he wore last week. I think we looked just fine and it was a lot less stressful than last week.

-I am beginning to have a love/hate relationship with our washer/dryer. I love that we have our own here in our unit, however, I think they are pretty much the worst things ever. The washer leaves things wet so I have to run everything on an extra spin cycle, and the dryer always seems to take over an hour to get things dry, then it leaves fuzz all over the place. Okay, rant over.

-We went to Sunday school this Sunday and it was wonderful to be back! I think Kev agreed. Made me so thankful for the ladies in the nursery who sacrifice by watching our kids so we Mom's and Dad's can go to class.

-My bad attitude about the whole condo situation often gets projected on my husband. I spend way too much time thinking about all the things he could be doing to help me more or what I wish he would do rather than appreciating all the things he is already doing. With his knee I have had to take on some of his responsibilities, which, with things like taking out the trash, is even more inconvenient now that we have to go through several locked doors to get to our trash can. I also have to carry everything when we go places (including Benjamin) because he can't with his crutches. The other night we couldn't get the outside door unlocked and I had to take Benjamin and walk all the way around to the front of the building to get in (at 9 o'clock at night).

But rather than be bitter because I have to help out a little more, shouldn't I appreciate that he normally does take care of these things? Since we've been married, he's always taken out the trash, I never even usually worry about it. I hardly ever have had to load the car, because he takes care of it. When we go places together (out to eat, church, etc), he almost always takes care of carrying Benjamin, loading him in and out of the car, etc. Rather than having a complaining spirit because I have to take care of those things temporarily, I should be thankful for all of the ways he contributes and helps out. He doesn't have to, but he does.

Still working on that whole humbling thing this week.